It is often the loss of respect rather than physical harm that most find hurts people for longer, and this could come about through the way someone treats you, or relates to you in front of others, or something that is completely outside your control that others blame you for. It can also often be imaginary, or what we think people may think about us, or even through a change of circumstances.
Your closest friends will love and support you whatever you do, and whatever the situation you find yourself in, others who advise you may do so as much out of not knowing what to say as any feeling of disrespect for you. Culture also plays a large part, within a fundamentalist Christian group getting caught out having an affair may be a hanging offence while with many other groups its more the topic of a good chuckle together. Likewise age will have a large impact, a girl of 15 who gets pregnant by mistake is going to get a tougher time than a single woman of 30.
What others think of you ultimately is not important, it is what you think of yourself, so if using our example you were happy to have an affair, getting caught should not effect you a lot, likewise if you respect yourself, your achievements and remember that those that do most get most out of life but also get to make the most mistakes, you will see setback as a part of life and they have no detrimental impact on you.
Ultimately if you have done something that you feel is so wrong, that you loose respect for yourself then decide to do something good or to help others and through this gain the self respect again.
